Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
去之前看到好评所以期待有点高 不过确实及格了 能看出导演的风格真的不同 bgm很出色 有被安室透的逼格装到 以及五人组真的很虐很好哭 高木和佐藤有亲亲
但是根源还是倒霉蛋的爱情故事和亲情和解片诶
短小精悍，本作有对于喜剧片来说出色的剧本，精妙的细节编排，富有创意的恶搞和层出不穷的喜剧效果。
还挺好看的，近五年来剧情做得最好的大电影。主线情节方面，主要是警察学校篇五人组的故事线，有感人有热血，有大场面涩谷爆炸，最后还在小新一这里收束了世界线。感受到了柯南系列特别是大电影继续拍续作的商业前景和生命力。唯独一点，推理的元素越来越弱了，完全就是二次元商业大片无限续作系列😂
好恶搞和超级英雄的话会觉得不错，但对于普通人来说比如我，那么就是介于无聊和一般之间了。
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈受苦白男请这么拍
除了少儿不宜之外，其他没什么缺点，我这种电影看多了的人很少笑，这部电影大笑了两次，一次是幻想上厕所，二次是小丑演员被吊起来那段
哈哈哈哈哈哈他们几人组合真的是我紧绷神经的舒缓剂
9.6/10 色彩丰富的视觉效果, 精彩合理的动作场面, 严丝合缝的推理, 真挚感动的故事, 形象鲜明的群像塑造, 以及对之前篇章合理的再利用与致敬... 时隔多年, 柯南制作组不以第二年的截稿线为目标敷衍了事, 不以粉丝的喜爱当作筹码; 相反专注于制作, 终于奉上了一部堪比前七部的优质作品。 无论是视觉呈现, 还是剧本完成度, 亦或角色刻画和比重分配, 此次制作组将过去十年剧场版的近乎所有失误于这一部全部修正, 奉上了一部足够大众化, 也极其精彩有趣的商业作品。 同时这样一部作品的诞生, 也成功为柯南这一商业品牌注入了更新鲜的活力与生命力。
不愧是法国版城市猎人团队出品，一本正经的恶搞，把超级英雄黑了个遍，哈哈
好吧虽然一直骂很难看 但是无聊到又点看了。。
即使严重失忆 完全记不得自己的爱人的情况下，还是会再次选择她
看半天觉得不是美国那种狗坨子耍法，一看果然是法国的。玩的一手好梗，有几段超好笑～蜘蛛侠那个看来是全球流行。。。
还行吧，现在法国片的笑点也是奇奇怪怪的，恶搞的内容也很显而易见，全片最搞笑的应该是那个吸尘器植入广告了
名字没起错，真超有超级英雄！！
警校去的那几位意难平啊。。随后剩下零一人真的太难过了。柯南七年前的回忆，最后零的那个眼神…久久不能平静，就不能像赤井秀一那样假死嘛！！！音乐不错，确实是很好看的一部剧场，比起去年…哈
笑死我了！
看着很开心啊 很粗俗 很恶搞 但是看着就是很开心啊 看到了漫威 还看到了DC 还有小小的温情
如果可以恶搞到底就更好了，失忆和讨好父亲这种非常cliche的桥段就该狠狠恶搞一下
好久没看这么过瘾的喜剧了，也好久没看过“失忆梗”的喜剧了。我是觉得，这部电影不单单是对好莱坞超级英雄电影的恶搞，很难不让我想到这个发明了电影及早期佳片无数的国家多少显得有些落寂。
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